I Might Try Email

I have been avoiding my email for approximately 13 years.

Checking my email feels like walking into an Everything Must Go sale at the Christmas Tree Shop.

I can’t remember the last time I opened my inbox.

How many trips around the world have I won, and missed out on?

How many would have been lovers risked it all only to never hear back from me?

How many chain letters am I now cursed forever for not forwarding?

When I hear the ping of an email come in, my lazy eye goes sideways, my teeth chatter, my shoulders tighten. It’s like a knock on the door when it’s snowing, I’m in my jams, sipping red wine and watching Killing Eve. Whatever it is, don’t want! Whatever it is, pass!

I find I use the imagery “life lunging at me” often in life, which means I’m constructing a world where I feel life is happening at me. I use that phrase a lot when I think of email.

Hmm.

Back to Wayfair coops and satisfaction surveys.

Anyway, I might try email. See what all the fuss is about and maybe, as an added bonus, overcome a paralyzing fear of life while getting $10 bucks off a pair of Hokas.

We’ll see.